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Let’s Have a Little Controversy What Really Matters to Women

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MarkelK
Engineer
Members
39 posts 4 Feb 2019 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:44 #1

I’m not looking for a politically correct answer. I want to understand what actually matters in real life.

I sometimes feel that people say personality and genuine connection matter most, but their actual choices may tell a different story.

When women choose a partner, how much does financial stability really matter compared with personality and genuine connection? Can a man with a good personality but limited money genuinely compete with someone who offers financial security?

I’m not saying all women are the same. I’m asking whether society has made money more important than genuine connection, or whether financial stability is simply a practical part of a relationship.

And if personality really matters most, why do you think people sometimes choose financial security over someone they genuinely connect with?

MarkelK - BF support
Ammo box is friendship.

F1Fly
Engineer
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39 posts 23 Jun 2026 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:49 #2

I would say first of all it's kind of offensive how you made it about women and not people in general

Secondly I would say people generally wouldn't compromise about anything important for the sake of money in a serious relationship, but there are always exceptions

F1Fly - ET pubs
See you on rng-et-1.

unstablez0
Engineer
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40 posts 6 Oct 2023 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:50 #3

May I suggest you check out ask women or ask men? This isn't exactly a casual conversation starter

unstablez0 - D&D nights
Nat 1s are character development.

blvstar
Field Medic
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33 posts 20 Oct 2020 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:51 #4

Someone who’s present

blvstar - ET / smokes
Utility first.

slyr1x
Engineer
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48 posts 5 Mar 2020 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:53 #5

Omg just treat people like people, “women be [shopping]” jokes were tired before you were even born and that’s literally what this viewpoint is leaning on.

slyr1x - BF64s
PTFO or mute.

carcok
Engineer
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44 posts 21 May 2021 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:56 #6

Heaven forbid you imagine women as individuals.....

carcok - EU evenings
CET after work.

MarkelK
Engineer
Members
39 posts 4 Feb 2019 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 16:59 #7

Omg, calling a question a stereotype doesn't actually answer it. “Treat people like people” is a nice slogan, but it doesn't explain why financial stability is often considered important when choosing a partner.

I'm not saying women are all the same, and I'm not saying money is everything. I'm asking whether people are being honest when they say personality matters most.

If you disagree, explain why. But dismissing the question as “women be shopping” doesn't really make your argument any stronger.

MarkelK - BF support
Ammo box is friendship.

carcok
Engineer
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44 posts 21 May 2021 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:01 #8

Because building a life with someone with only one stable income isn't feasible in this day and age anymore. Especially if you're looking to merge finances down the road.

carcok - EU evenings
CET after work.

Egor93
Field Medic
Members
33 posts 30 Aug 2021 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:02 #9

>I want to understand what actually matters in real life.

To who?

The "not politically correct" answer is that I find your question to be kinda stupid. Every individual has their own story and different values, opinions, dreams, needs, etc. etc. And that will have as much, or more, to do with circumstances of birth, culture and geography than gender imho.

Egor93 - ET pubs
See you on rng-et-1.

MarkelK
Engineer
Members
39 posts 4 Feb 2019 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:03 #10

I get your point about making it about women, but I think you're reading more into my question than I intended.

I asked about women because I wanted to hear women's perspectives. That doesn't mean I think men don't care about money, or that women are all the same.

And I agree that people shouldn't compromise on everything important just for money. But that's actually what I'm trying to understand: where do people draw the line between genuine connection and financial stability?

For example, if someone has a great personality but is financially unstable, would that genuinely not matter to you in a serious relationship? Or would it still be an important factor, even if it isn't the most important one?

MarkelK - BF support
Ammo box is friendship.

kohayu2d
Engineer
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42 posts 9 Jun 2020 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:04 #11

Non political correct answer. It’s different for different people. You can’t make generalizations about all women, or all men, or all of any group.

Society is so fractured right now that you can’t even make good generalizations, because different sections of society want different things.

Don’t try to make yourself into what others want. Make yourself into yourself. And try not to be a jerk. That’s it.

kohayu2d - Axis defense
Do not walk my MG line twice.

HESU338925
Panzer Ace
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126 posts 4 Jul 2024 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:06 #12

If you’re talking about a relationship between man and woman, if their personality compliment each other then that will work, having financial stability would always be a plus.

HESU338925 - ET pubs
See you on rng-et-1.

blyatmanggcyka
Rifleman
Members
21 posts 27 Feb 2022 joined
7 Sep 2026 at 17:06 #13

The same sorts of things that I imagine most men care about…

A safe place to live

Enough food to eat

Family and friends who love me

A job that pays the bills and that keeps me engaged without burning me out

Time and money to have some fun

blyatmanggcyka - BF support
Ammo box is friendship.

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